Apparently pigs CAN fucking fly

Our own little piglet is free at last, free at last. I don't know how he did it--well, of course, I know exactly how he did it. Junior just threatened to have Fitzgerald's entire family sent to Gitmo for a little PR suicide. He said leave my turd blossom alone or you will have your hands cut off and your eyes gauged out and holes drilled in your fucking head and your cock stuffed down your throat while it's still attached to your body. Sadly, Junior doesn't have such a firm grasp of human anatomy. But Fitzfuckwad got the message. So the Rovermeister is free to lie and leak and fix voting machines, just like always. Life is grand again. I always knew that boy was innocent. Now if he can just ditch the secret evidence he was hiding....