Shhhh. I'm listening to your phone call

I'm being very quiet, of course, though if you hear some heavy breathing, that's me. Right now you're telling your sister how you got fucked in the ass last night by some drug addict loser you picked up in your AA meeting. Pretty fucking interesting. Especially the part where you took Ecstasy and cough syrup and tequila. Fucking yum. Oh, and now you're talking to your doctor about how your pussy hurts. I wouldn't fucking wonder. You're much more fucking fun than the priest I was listening to yesterday, with all those fucking confessions he was telling some nun about. Though I was a little surprised he named names the way he did. We may not be learning a fucking thing about terrorist attacks but we get some pretty fucking great dirt. Hold the phone, you fuckwits.